My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the r

i mean, i love him and we're talking engagement, but i cant help harping on him. if we're still technically dating, why has the effort stopped? i look great when we go out [or try to] and yet he's in the same cowboy boots [especially on valentines night at a 4star restaurant, OMG] and slacks and shirt. give me a break. and wearing cologne doesn閳ユ獩 make you gay, if i like it and im your woman and its a turn-on, why is it such a fight for one little thing? am i threatening his masculinity or was he raised by aliens? do i let it go and marry him and try not to let this crap bug me for the next 60 years??!!!??

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

BEASUSE YOU WITH EVER DAY YOU KNOW MANY MAN IS LIKE THIS.

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

If you don't like the guy he already is then I wouldn't marry him. Trying to change him is only going to cause fights, and even if he does change, he will probably just eventually change back or resent you. I know the changes are small, but to him it probably seems more like a fight about control.

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

If these petty things are bugging you now, it's time to quit. It will only get worse. You say the effort has "stopped" - has he ever worn cologne? There may be a reason he doesn't wear it - like it makes him itch, or he doesn't like the strong odor. Obviously, that is a personal quirk that he has.

As for the boots, they're obviously comfortable. He's not a loafer guy. Rather than getting aggravated over loafers, encourage him to buy a dress set of boots - they do come in dressy as well as mundane (I'm from Texas - we wear them everywhere around here, and some run over $500 a pair).

And hair gel? What's the big deal if he doesn't want spikes, or doesn't want the slick look.

All in all, he sounds like a relaxed type, and you sound like a real go-getting jet setter. Perhaps you need to revisit your priorities, or your lifestyles before you tie the knot.

P.S.: You said "such a fight for one little thing" - you've mentioned 3 here already. How many more "one little things" did you not even list? Think about it...

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

why SHOULD he change??? and why do you think he should be BETTER??? if you wanted better, maybe you should have found someone better... instead of settling for a "do upper"...

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

Better him !!!!!!

only he can better himself, because its what comes from the inside that really counts.

My man hates cologne, cool loafers and hair gel. i dont wanna change him, only better him. why the resistance?

He sounds to me like a real man whom most women would go for. Who wants to be seen with a spikey haired, loafer wearing wimp who smells like a prostitute`s office?